I'm not ready to love someone new, but I'm ready to stop loving you.

Thank you for showing me I can love someone to this extent.

(Draft since 1st June 2015) - I guess it's time.

The Dream

I saw a dream
Long lost to me
In search of
Another's waking

It found a shoreline
Far away
As the day -
As my heart
Was breaking

And I sighed and I wept
For what could not be -
And for all that could
Have been

For every hope
And every prayer
Long drowned
Beneath the sea

I fell to sleep
Alone that night
To the sound
Of a distant call

The faintest whisper
Of good-bye -
And the dream
Was mine, no more

Lang leav

Bestfriends are sisters from previous lives

So here I am at 4.30am rushing my assignment and my best friend is on my right snoring away.

I cherish moments like these. I've known Jocelyn Chua Wei Qi since forever. From primary 1 days when we were all that we've got till now and somethings just don't change.

We hated each other so much but our ego wouldn't allow us to have recess alone, so we sucked it up and put up with one another for a year.

After that this Chua ah lian went to switch primary school and there she was again as my classmate in secondary 1. Again history repeated itself.

But along the way of hating one another, we realised it was because we saw ourselves in the other person. And before I know it, she made a mark and was very much a big part of Sarah Yong's life.

I've known of girlfriends and their bestfriends but none quite like us. One tall one short one skinny one fat, we are indeed a perfect 10.

Over the past 15 years, we've cried and laughed countless of times. Mostly laughing until we cry la. We've gone through soooo much I don't even know where to begin. Thank you for knowing and loving me more than I know and love myself.

Someday we'll both get married and have children. Our kids may have stayovers like we do. It's a silent agreement that we are gonna be the godmas of our children, just so you know, I promise to love them as my very own.

I know this is very selfish of me but I think the first to go is a luckier one. I wouldn't be able to bear standing at your grave one day, crying, talking and reminding you of our good old days. I'd rather you do that cause its payback time for all my love showered upon you this lifetime. *crying as I'm typing this and you're snoring like a cb pig*

For now sleep well my dear, for I'm gonna force you to cook me some love tomorrow.

爱你啦

Jumbled up on purpose, that's how much we have changed over the years.

The Most Ridculous Thing Just Happened.

Like I'm not even exaggerating.

I alighted from the cab (with my mum tagging a good 10 steps behind) and walked towards the lift at our void deck.

Here's what I witnessed:

1. On my left, a guy went inside the lift and proceeded to second floor

2. On my right, a girl was at the letter box apparently on the phone with someone.

So I was just waiting for my mum to catch up when I overheard the girl's conversation in mandarin: "So fucking stupid, second floor also want take lift, like what the fuck, anyway letters a lot, wah fucking stupid la seriously blablabla." She went on and on and on.

In my mind I was thinking, what is your problem girl. Hahaha he cannot take the lift ah why must curse until like that, chill la he paid for the lift works too, just like all of us. He is entitled to what. So poor thing second floor then banned from taking the lift ah? Not like you run after the lift then he closed the door in your face what. I saw you taking your own sweet time at the letter box.

Then when my mum caught up, I told her very softly, don't share lift with this girl but I didn't explain why. My mother funny la asked me in an audible voice: "why don't share", and I said I'll tell her later.

When the girl entered the lift, I told her that the guy pressed second floor kena cursed until damn jialat, if we pressed third floor confirm kena from her in the lift too.

This whole time I was still laughing, I think I good mood that's why.

Came the epic part liao.

The lift stopped at 5th floor, 9th floor and 12th floor. LOL

Do you know what just happened not?!

SHE PLAYED WITH THE LIFT BUTTONS LEH HAHAHAHAHAHA SERIOUSLY.

She's like in her late twenties, but behaving like a delinquent.

My mum and I exchanged glances when we saw the lift going to higher floors and I started giggling.

Like what? LOL. We suspect she stayed at the 5th floor cause she wouldn't have pressed any buttons that might delay her journey up to her floor what right. Don't think she's THAT dumb la, if not self pawn. Hahaha

Bo bianz suck thumb, my mum and I just had to wait for the lift to come back to the first floor.

BUT IT WAS SO RIDICULOUS I WASN'T EVEN ANGRY LIKE OKAY I HOPE PLAYING WITH THE LIFT BUTTONS MADE YOU HAPPIER FOR GETTING BACK AT US FOR NOT SHARING LIFT WITH YOU BECAUSE I DIDN'T WANNA GET CURSED AT.

HAHAHAHAHA SINGAPOREANS LOLOLOL

If any I should be the one who flipped, I cabbed back cause I was so tired. I only slept for an hour and been up since 6.30am. For more than 16 hours in zombie mode. But really I thought it was so retarded I couldn't even be bothered to get angry.

This is just classic omg.

And He Popped The Question..

IN MY DREAMS.

HAHAHA.

I don't even have a boyfriend, pop what question.

"Pizza onz not?"
"Onz la."

BUT THIS DOES NOT STOP ME FROM FANTASIZING ABOUT MY DREAM WEDDING.

If even maids have angmoh boyfriends, then why am I still single. Sigh it's okay, I'm on the path of practicing self sufficiency. The nunnery wants me.

Then again I bet that there are nuns who thought about their wedding dresses before God saved them from Adam(s) or for some, Eve(s). I'm just kidding, please don't hate me. I love my sisters, amen.

Okay my point is that my friend is getting married soon and she's a hot Ukrainian girl who is just a year older than I am, with a really huge rock on her finger (pssst it's at least three carats by the way)

It looks something like this if you're wondering.

And she got proposed the way I've always wanted my boyfriend (who is currently stuck in some tree, it's okay I'm waiting for you my baby) to propose to me.

LIKE HOW AWWISH IS THAT. I saw the pictures and I'm really very happy for her.

Kao. Angmoh really different please, he went down on one knee, then mai siao siao got sunset at the back, champagne all in Greece hor. Em' tumblr hweels 有没有. Okay ah lian, back into the wardrobe.

So it got me thinking, when was the last time I actually felt like I could share my life with someone, and his face appeared in my head. Okay moving on!

My Dream Proposal

I really don't need something over the top like fireworks or jumping off buildings.

Just kneel down with a decent ring and a nice bouquet of flowers with overflowing love.

Better yet, if you start crying or choking on your tears, I will melt faster than ice-cream in summer.

Am I the only one who thinks that romance in Singapore is dead?

"Baby, let's go apply for BTO."

"Okay lor, need to plan ahead for flat hor."

"Mummy, how did daddy propose to you?"

"With our house la, if not you sleep where!"

My Dream Gown & Wedding

I'm not exactly into having the usual hundred tables typical Chinese wedding banquet. I mean honestly, sometimes the bride and groom don't know half of the people invited to their wedding. The irony. Please, sometimes even I don't know the bride or the groom, I just go there for the food. HAHA.

But I'm not going to be really particular about the wedding. After all it's who you're marrying and not just that one day of glamour. We never know maybe someday I marry an Indonesian tycoon become tai-tai, if he wants two thousand tables, he can have two thousand and one tables. LOL. Or what if I marry some hot Brazilian guy who wants his wedding to be dancing in the canopy, he can Jamaican style all he wants.

If I get to choose, it will be something like this:

A Chapel Wedding for Solemnisation Process, Lace Wedding Gown

That's during the day and

Garden/ Beach Wedding for the Banquet, Simple White Dress

Something like that would be lovely, ending the night with champagne, music and lots of dancing.

Can I just marry myself already? Hahaha.

I think I've watched too much chick flicks. But hey, dreams don't hurt no one!

This blogpost made me smile for an hour or two, and that's good enough for now. Shall blog about my dream home the next time. It's back to assignments for now.

Love, Sarah.

You don't need anyone to tell you, your self-worth.

My First Tattoo Experience

As most of you know, I've just had my first tattoo.

After 22 years of contemplating long and hard, I went ahead this afternoon, 31st May 2015 at 2:45pm.

I don't believe in doing something behind my mum's back so I informed her way beforehand. Hahaha she's not exactly thrilled about the idea but being the amazing mother she is, she was there the entire time even when she couldn't bear to see me in pain.

There you have it, my team of supporters at Johnny Two Thumbs Tattoo Studo:

Second photo's a lil blur and fat face every single time :(

Why Johnny Two Thumbs?

Cause my uncle had three of his tattoos done there and since I always go there *support support* I made friends with most of the tattoo artists already. Heh. Yes it has a lot to do with branding too. It's like Adidas in this industry. Also I like how when I lie down, I'm actually looking at shelves of vintage alcohol bottles, badass tattoo photographs and their pretty awesome music playlist.

The ever patient Aloysif who is great with fonts, thank you so much :)

Every tattoo artist has a different forte, some are good with realistic portraits, others are great with tribal patterns etc, you have to find one with a specific expertise.

What did I tattoo?

It's a personal thing and I'm not going to post pictures of it. Unless, well if you see it then you see it la. Hahaha. It's just a word that means a lot to me, some of you guys know what it is and the font that I chose. So far, everyone likes it and as for me, I really really am in love with it.

Where did I tattoo mine?

My ribs. If you wanna have tattoos, you need to think about where you wanna have it. Honestly, I wanted it on my arms, wrists etc but it's with much consideration that I've decided for it to be hidden under any type of clothing (excluding bikini). And different parts of your body means different pain zones. On a scale of green to red, ribs are purple (which means it's out of the scale). Ribs are one of the most painful parts, literally anywhere that is just bones and still bones, such as spine or head or collarbone.

How was the pain like?

I'm somebody with NO threshold for pain, not just low. I cry when I pierced my ears, I wince at paper cuts, I flinch at blisters etc you get my point.

I would say sometimes it's 2/10 and other times it's 8/10. It ranges from time to time, be it outlining, shading, on ribs or fleshy spots. Mostly the pain is more mental than physical, it's really all in the mind. If you tell yourself to relax, it's a whole lot more bearable.
Ps: I cheated by drinking some beer beforehand, I'd like to think it worked. HAHAHA. But it's strongly not advisable cause some might end up bleeding more. I didn't bleed at all hehe so yeah I was quite lucky. I would say drink a can of Coke during the tattoo session if possible, I was feeling anemic(?) aka low sugar in blood when I stood up.

With this I will give the greatest shoutout to Bryan Liem for allowing me to squeeze your hand for forty five mins without a single word of complain. Thank you so so so so so much babe, really <3

How long did it take?
About an hour and a half? Forty five mins of confirming font size and placement, forty five mins of tattooing process.

How much was it?
A hundred bucks and I think it's pretty reasonable.

Would I do it again?

Yes, yes, yes and yes.

Pictures taken from my gopro (I blurred some out so that my tattoo can't be seen haha I know wth right but ohwell):

That was my happy face when I saw it in mirror, lying back again to get it bandaged. Hahaha thanks Jazreel for helping me with the videos:)

I will keep updating this post about the maintenance of tattoos:

Six hours later and it is starting to ache a little against my ribs.

Bathing didn't hurt at all just now.

Two more days before I can start applying moisturiser.

(Ian says I should wait until the sixth day before applying tho)

Two days later, my skin has started to dry up around the outlines.

Ribs are aching constantly, felt like I bumped into a sharp corner of a table.

Four days later my skin was itching like a bitch.

Five days later still extremely itchy.

Six days later my skin was peeling, I was told it means it's healing.

With love,

Sarah Yong