My girlfriends are the sweetest.

Thank you for checking on me, you know who you girls are :)

Thank you for showering me with abundance of tender loving care.

Thank you for providing me with bimbotic secrets on how to get rid of swollen eyes, throwing away my mucus filled tissues and immediately opening a new packet like it's free of charge.

Thank you for giving me endless encouragement and strength that I need, to keep living life to the fullest.

Thank you for placing yourselves in my shoes and feeling unjust for me, silly girls.

(Thank you for helping me bitch about you know who, damn shiok uh the feeling I can't even.. And of course for making me laugh and cry and laugh and cry and choke on my own tears from laughing.)

Thank you for all your texts from around the world just to make sure that I'm still alive, breathing and kicking.

Thank you for all the late nightsss support knowing that some nights would be the roughest.

Thank you for letting me know that I'm never alone and that I'll always, always be loved.

Thank you for understanding that this hasn't been tad bit easy for me.

Most importantly, thank you for the assurance that no matter what, I'll definitely have my girlfriendssssssssss who are more than willing to walk down this journey called life, that is full of ups and downs, together.

Thank you mummy for everything. Sorry for making you cry with me every single time I breakdown. I know you're reading this, thank you.

Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.

周杰伦 - 彩虹 Lyrics

哪里有彩虹告诉我

能不能把我的愿望还给我

为什么天这么安静

所有云都跑到我这里

有没有口罩一个给我

释怀说了太多就成真不了

也许时间是一种解药

也是我现在正服下的毒药

看不见你的笑 我怎么睡得着

你的身影这么近我却抱不到

没有地球太阳还是会绕

没有理由我也能自己走

你要离开 我知道很简单

你说依赖 是我们的阻碍

就算放开 那能不能别没收我的爱

当作我最后才明白

有没有口罩一个给我

释怀说了太多就成真不了

也许时间是一种解药

也是我现在正服下的毒药

看不见你的笑 我怎么睡得着

你的身影这么近我却抱不到

没有地球太阳还是会绕

没有理由我也能自己走

你要离开 我知道很简单

你说依赖 是我们的阻碍

就算放开 那能不能别没收我的爱

当作我最后才明白

看不见你的笑

要我怎么睡得着

你的身影这么近我却抱不到

没有地球太阳开始环绕环绕

没有理由我也能自己走掉

是我说了太多就成真不了

也许时间是一种解药解药

也是我现在正服下的毒药

你要离开 我知道很简单

你说依赖 是我们的阻碍

就算放开 那能不能别没收我的爱

当作我最后才明白

Miley Cyrus - Wrecking Ball Lyrics

We clawed, we chained our hearts in vain

We jumped never asking why

We kissed, I fell under your spell

A love no one could deny

Don't you ever say I just walked away

I will always want you

I can't live a lie, running for my life

I will always want you

I came in like a wrecking ball

I never hit so hard in love

All I wanted was to break your walls

All you ever did was wreck me

Yeah, you, you wreck me

I put you high up in the sky

And now, you're not coming down

It slowly turned, you let me burn

And now, we're ashes on the ground

Don't you ever say I just walked away

I will always want you

I can't live a lie, running for my life

I will always want you

I came in like a wrecking ball

I never hit so hard in love

All I wanted was to break your walls

All you ever did was wreck me

I came in like a wrecking ball

Yeah, I just closed my eyes and swung

Left me crashing in a blazing fall

All you ever did was wreck me

Yeah, you, you wreck me

I never meant to start a war

I just wanted you to let me in

And instead of using force

I guess I should've let you win

I never meant to start a war

I just wanted you to let me in

I guess I should've let you win

Don't you ever say I just walked away

I will always want you

I came in like a wrecking ball

I never hit so hard in love

All I wanted was to break your walls

All you ever did was wreck me

I came in like a wrecking ball

Yeah, I just closed my eyes and swung

Left me crashing in a blazing fall

All you ever did was wreck me

Yeah, you, you wreck me

Yeah, you, you wreck me

Surprise surprise

It's actually pretty scary to think that one girl could be so fucking scheming just to get what she wants. I'm not here to play your game. 

You THINK you know.

There's no point going around and asking others "what happened", "do you know this this.. that that.." Stop speculating. I'm the only one with answers. Only I know the complete truth. So even if you hear it from someone, you might prolly only have half the story.

In the meantime, I need beers. More beers.

By Robbie Zimmer

Date a man who loves you more. Meet him young, at a time when you’re not old enough to realize how precious he is. Fall in love carelessly. Start to think he must be the one, begin building a life with him. Become entangled with his family and him with yours, believe he will be the father of your children in later years. Date a man who loves you more because he will love everything you hate about yourself. The man who loves you more will rub your feet when you’re tired and take your cousins out for ice cream because he is simply that kind of man. He will abandon his plans to come rub your back when you’re sick without you ever having to ask. The man who loves you more will allow you to grow as a person without taking space. He will be patient, kind; he will know when to apologize and when to be quiet. He will never yell. He will laugh at your jokes and find you beautiful, even at your worst. The man who loves you more will love you entirely, unconditionally; he will follow you anywhere and do anything for you. 

As you grow with the man who loves you more, ignore the creeping sense of boredom. Ignore it because it is selfish, it is unbecoming, and you know you should be satisfied with this perfect man. Ignore it because you watch the women around you, your friends, your sisters, your co-workers, and you know they all long for the man you have. Ignore the melancholia and the longing you feel every time you watch a couple fight with passion, with anger, with fire. Count on your fingers the number of fights you’ve had over the years, and consider yourself lucky without really believing it. Ignore the nostalgia you feel for moments that have never existed. Ignore it because you know passion is fleeting, passion is mercurial; passion is not something you build a life on. Passion will not raise your kids, it will not pay your mortgage. When passion fades, you tell yourself, you are left with nothing but regret. Ignore the slow leak of emptiness filling your gut when you kiss him, because it does not belong in your life. It does not belong with this perfect man who loves you more. He is dependable and with him, you know you will lead a lifetime of contentment. You will travel with him, you will push him towards his goals. You will have wonderful memories and photo albums. You will celebrate milestones with pride, you will grow old holding his hand and raise balanced children with him. When your children fall in love, you will smile and hope they find someone who loves them more, because it will guarantee them the satisfied life you have led.

Do not date the other man because the other man will never give you the stability you know you need. Stay away from the other man because with him, you are unreliable. The other man will never be there for you with the same dependability you have come to expect. He will challenge you and push you to question everything you think you know about yourself. The other man will love you, he will love you in ways that make you abandon every certainty you have ever had, but he will not help you keep your balance. Just when you think you have figured that man out, he will disorient you, you will be winded, you will not be able to breathe. Date the man who loves you more because the other man will never need you. He will miss you when you’re gone, he will secretly be broken, but he will go on without you because he does not depend on anyone. This man is treacherous, you cannot trust yourself with him.

When things are good with this man, you will be euphoric. You will be the best version of yourself. You will look in the mirror and find you are beautiful. You will be the luckiest woman in the world, and you will believe it. You will tell him you love him and the words will explode out of your heart because it will be the first time you have ever encountered such irrevocable truth. He will say it back and mean it, and you will feel like you can never be close enough to him. You will lose yourself in him, and he will lose himself in you. Stay away from this man because your happiness will be fleeting. When things are bad with him, he will fight back. He will not be patient, he will not soothe you. The other man will be infuriating. He will be selfish, careless with his words and at times even cruel. He will try to inflict as much pain on you as he himself is feeling. He will not apologize and he will push you to your limits. With this man, you can expect the dizzying agony of passion, the blurred oblivion of apathy, the delicious comfort of despair, the addictive misery of loneliness. You will tell yourself that it is better to have loved and lost than to have never loved at all, but in that moment of utter hopelessness, you will not believe it with absolute conviction.

Date a man who loves you more because while he can never be quite enough, the other man will always be too much. The other man will leave you thirsty for more, parched for him, panicked like a drunk who has finished his last bottle. Date that man who loves you more, fall for him in a slow and steady way, build a foundation with him and consider, truly consider, how lucky you are to have found him. Do all this, because with the other man, you will never know anything but a frenzied hunger and all-encompassing madness. With that man you will burn bright and fast, and you will be invincible until you are not. Find the man who loves you more and keep him because the worth of happiness cannot be measured in days and months and years, and those fleeting few memories of pure, unadulterated bliss will never measure up to the lifetime of contentment you will have with the man who loves you more. Tell yourself this over and over, let it become your mantra, and condition yourself to believe it. Forget the other man, or at least try to, ignore the smells, the sounds and the things that remind you of him, ignore the way he made you feel, because you are better off apart. Together you make the world explode, but you cannot survive in it after. Date the man who loves you more, choose him and never let him go, because you are wise enough to know that stories of true love never have a happy ending, and with this man at least you will die knowing someone loved you more.

This.

By Jamesmsama

7 Signs You're Giving Too Much

A healthy relationship is about give and give, not give and take. It’s not even 50/50, it’s more like 100/100. There is no “part time” relationship, you’re either in…or you’re out.

But sometimes, our judgment gets clouded. We really care about the person we’re with so we’re willing to do everything for them. The difference between being part of a solid relationship and being a doormat, is if they’re willing to do the same for you in return (without you asking for it).

So, how do you know when you’re giving too much? When is enough…enough?

You’re smiling less when you’re alone.

The one person you can’t hide your feelings from, is yourself. It’s easy to convince those around us that we’re happy with the situation we’re in and with our partner. Of course no relationship is 100% perfect, but if you begin to feel down when they’re not around (and not because you’re missing them), this could be a sign of your true feelings coming to the surface.

The only way to lead a happy, fulfilling life is to first be true to yourself and what you want and need.

You’re even asking yourself this question in the first place.

I recently received a message on Facebook that went as follows:

Personally I’m going through an episode where she is feeling out or dating other guys because they deserve a “chance.” But my opinion is that although I care for you and you know it without a shadow of a doubt, that if you have to continue to search after 3 months of countless dates and hanging out, then you’re not searching for me and you’re willing to forego what’s in front of you for what’s in the mystery box.

I believe that as difficult as it is for us to sift through our own emotions at times, it is an integral part of a happy life and relationship. We are the only ones who truly know what we’re feeling inside our own heart and mind, and if you find hesitancy like this poking through your consciousness, it’s probably a red flag.

Reciprocity is key, and if you’re questioning whether or not your partner is putting in their best effort, the answer is probably no.

You feel emotionally exhausted.

A solid relationship should enhance your life, not complicate your life. You should feel energized by the other persons’ presence in your life. Inspired. Motivated. Excited.

If you are mentally and emotionally drained, you may be sacrificing your own well-being for the sake of an unhealthy relationship.

You’re losing sight of you.

Do you feel like more of a servant than a partner? If you are always working to make your partner happy but rarely or never see the effort reciprocated, it’s very easy to lose sight of your own wants and needs because you’ve become too caught up in theirs.

Anyone who reads my articles knows that I am all for being loving and giving at all stages of a relationship, but it’s important to make sure that it goes both ways.

There would be voids if it wasn’t for you.

Voids in things to do together, voids in physical intimacy, voids in conversation.

If you are always the one who is suggesting activities, initiating physical contact, or taking care of things around the house – then you probably already realize that you’re carrying the relationship and giving too much of yourself away.

Happy, healthy relationships are a team – and like any good team, each player has their strengths which fit together like puzzle pieces with the other players to create a strong partnership. If one player doesn’t carry their weight, the team will lose.

You jumped into commitment before they were ready.

When I met my girlfriend, I knew basically immediately that I was no longer interested in talking to any other women – but I also knew this feeling had to be mutual and we needed to let the first few dates take their course to see if the luster would last (it did, thankfully).

I’ve seen, many a time, people dive head first into a relationship with someone, swear off all other members of the opposite sex right away, and end up hurt. They think that giving their entire being to the other person will make them return the sentiment and love. It doesn’t. It needs to come naturally from both sides.

You worry about losing them and keep trying harder.

If we begin to feel someone slowly slipping away from us, some of us may find it natural to try harder and to put more effort in to keep them around. Often times this does the exact opposite and pushes them away.

This is where it’s key for the relationship to have healthy communication. Taking guesses at what might “fix” a problem is simply a band-aid solution. If something is wrong, we need to have the maturity and discipline to discuss it, no matter how difficult it may be.

While relationships do often take work, they shouldn’t feel like work. If your interactions with your partner are forced and don’t feel natural or fulfilling, then this is an instinct that shouldn’t be ignored.

Life is too short to waste your time on people who don’t appreciate you. Value your time, your body, and most of all – your heart. Stop giving these things to people who don’t deserve them.

There will be someone who comes along and accepts you for you – if you have the discipline to only accept the love you truly deserve.

The Education System in Singapore

Please allow me to use swimming as an example. (I find it pretty apt.)

We used to 'swim' in our mother's womb since her pregnancy period of 9 months and the moment we are delivered in this society, we have never stopped swimming.

However from the period of age 1 to 3, we were made to learn how to walk and we conveniently forget our natural habitat and instincts.

But always remember - life is a vicious cycle.

So we were educated on how to swim, pun intended on every bit.

Pre school - we were subtly informed that we used to swim instead.

At such a young and tender age, those napkin-diapers abductors aka teachers were actually preparing us to swim for the rest of our lives. Deceitful much? My entire childhood of choosing crayon colours, has been nothing but full of lies.

Primary school - we were given theory based swimming lessons and practicals were on flat, dry and safe grounds (homework).

I specifically remember crying a lot in class during my p2 days. I should have known that it was just the beginning..

Secondary school - we were told to get into the pool first, then given a quick revision class on how to control breathing (stress management) and mostly provided with essential floats and life vests (notes).

Um, need I say more? This is where our parents start paying for extra swimming lessons.

Tertiary - we were kicked into the pool and many had to swim overnight to find floatation devices.

I vividly remember those nights full of unsaved-documents-horror when my Microsoft Word crashed.

University (for myself, as of now) - brutally thrown in the sea.

Period.

Li Yang's 21st Birthday Party and Ego Boost Day

19th April, Saturday, 8.30pm

Just a BBQ session at his place with a really small group of close friends.

Haha people so rich please, I swear stay landed property one really different. Don't even need to pay for venue, shiok or what.

His stupid girlfriend in Birmingham uh. Shu Ting, if you're reading this: for your boyfriend I was so damn awkward at the party for so long omg I actually fell asleep at one point. Wtf I don't really know anyone uh.. Your fault.

But since he is my good friend and his girlfriend is my soulmate, I still went for the party k. Aww so sweet right me. HAHA.

By the way, I knew Li Yang because his group of friends were on a grad trip at the same time that my friends and I were on a grad trip in Taiwan too. We exchanged contacts and apparently there were sparks between Shu Ting and Li Yang uh. Hahaha now think back really WHATTHEFUCK.

Hahaha okay uh, I fell asleep not because it was boring (the host really not bad, I give him chance k). But they (a lot of army boys) were having BBQ and I have already eaten my dinner beforehand. And and mainly also due to the birthday boy's fault. I only slept for 4 hours the night before, texting him about his love for my girlfriend (TSK envious or what, I also want a love like that *sigh*) and like I had school at 8.30am?! And and and his aircon broke down, the temperature was steaming ohmygod.

Birthday boy, Li Yang:

Awkward body language cause we were perspiring like mad, no joke.

-To be updated-

I can't post what I bought for him because the parcel from ASOS is not here yet! :( I'm so sorry for the belated gift! But anyway, happy 21st birthday Mr Chan and may all your wishes come true. I bet they already did when you met Shu Ting! <3

The last 15mins of the party was really epic. This guy called Sam (Li Yang's friend who I met in Taiwan too) kept disturbing me. They were sort of like sitting around him and then he had to call out to me = all the attention on both of us for a good whole 15mins *facepalm*. At first I wanted to just fade into darkness and leave unnoticed. My plans officially went down the drain.

He was just joking but that guy really super annoyingly funny. He said he wanted to date me and all, what so fast meet mother-in-law (cause my mummy was coming to pick me), asked if he is my type etc etc. EVERYBODY WAS LAUGHING. I was laughing too because he is really damn funny to the point of like witty? If I slammed him with insults about his height for example, he will always have something else to say to save his ass.

It's been so long since I last hung out with strangers and it felt really good. Carefree moments spent laughing with no strings attached (I probably wouldn't even recognise them on the streets and I'm sure it's vice versa) are the best. What a night! :)

My ootd for Li Yang's party. I was the only one inappropriately dressed for a BBQ of which I wasn't informed beforehand k:

Guess what, the teasing doesn't end with Sam. The whole night my phone was spammed with friends in Uni teasing me about my ootd photo on instagram. What nose bleed and all, omg I was blushing like crazy. Like so red that Issac said I looked like the chili crabs he had during dinner.

Front camera cannot even capture the redness please. I was blushing like cray cray. This is the 'chili crab' photo.

I just kept begging them to stop and I wanted to dig a hole. "Eh enough already uh!" But they really fed my ego and god, I could actually get used to that. LOL. It's been so long since I last received compliments, I think I was high on drugs yesterday. Hahaha.

(For a moment I actually felt unworthy of all the compliments.. I have to stop doubting myself and to hell with insecurities.)

That Dickson and Mikelle really last warning.. I was laughing in hysterics in the middle of the night! Thanks I know I chio (pretty), don't need keep reminding me. *flips hair* HAHAHA FUCK. See lah I'm flying already uh! Shaun, your fault uh what nosebleed and catch me if I fly.. Hahaha shit I think even my ears are turning red.

3 more months to the dismounting of my braces, I absolutely cannot wait. X

Tumblr

“One day, whether you 
are 14, 
28 
or 65 you will stumble upon
 someone who will start 
a fire in you that cannot die.

 However, the saddest, 
most awful truth 
you will ever come to find is - they are not always
 with whom we spend our lives.”

Beau Taplin, "The Awful Truth" (via flowerbrain)

Tick tock tick tock

Counting down:

2 more weeks to Finals

14 more days to Finals

336 more hours to Finals

20,160 more minutes to Finals

1,209,600 more seconds to Finals

Tumblr

“He who is attracted to you because you showed perhaps your legs or your shape - those legs are not going to look like that for the rest of your life, nor will you be able to maintain that shape forever. So therefore it is better for you to realise that he who is attracted to your heart, your goodness and your character is the one to whom no matter what you look like, he will love you and adore you and 60 years down the road would still tell you that you’re ‘the one’.”

Mufti Ismail Menk

Everything, everything is in a mess right now.

Promiscuous Cosumerism

Sarah's Interpretation of Steve Taylor's Profound Wisdom.

Well, so I had my revision class yesterday conducted by Dr. Steve Taylor from University of London. He was so funny and engaging, that's why I say UK lecturers are of a different league as compared to local lecturers. He is practically famous in the field of Sociology just in case you are wondering which module..

So we got down to the chapter of globalisation and its no wonder why Sociology is called Sociology. It's not some crappy module like Amath (yes I'm still taking this) which is utterly useless for my future. (Some parts of) Sociology are relevant with regards to our everyday life.

He said something like how our society is all about consumerism and he also compared traditional era to our modern world. Not only based on goods and services but also with respect to relationships and marriages. Lets for instance, use our cellphones or mobiles as examples.

Communication has evolved, together with technology. It was initially created or invented to improve communication but I strongly believe that it has in many ways actually worsened communication. I could write an entire essay about this but this is not what this post is about.

In the past, we never had phones. We made do with what we have. In the past, even forced (match-made) marriages worked out well.

In the past, we didn't have a choice, if we wanted to be connected with our other halves, we would write love letters and wait for months to receive it. In the past, we didn't have a choice, women were born to be housewives and men were born to bring home the bacon.

Now, we have phones and the 'distance' between everyone has actually drifted further. 

Now, we have a choice, we have a say, we know what we want.

Now we are all a promiscuous consumer. As soon as the newer models for hand phones are to be released in the market, we would dispose/ sell/ trade-in our existing model for a more current one. No one is loyal to their hand phones, ever. (Just for the sake of this argument, let's say you have enough disposable income to go around.)

If you think about it relationship-wise, it's pretty much the same. It's scary isn't it? Someone comes along with better specifications and disposal of the existing one is almost instantaneous.

Not a sweeping statement saying that everyone is unfaithful. Just that Dr Taylor has a point. How many of us marry our first love? How many of us moved on to find someone with better prospects, who 'fits' us better? That is our future hand phone per say. Even marriage sometimes lead to divorce.

So really, everyone is a promiscuous consumer. It is in us that constantly want to have something better, something more worthy. That is why, if you're not treating your other half right, be prepared for him/her to move on. It's not wrong, it's just in us.

We are no longer living in the pre-modern society. Sad to say, not everyone learns or knows how to make do with what they have. Because always remember, there's always something out there that is better than what they have. But also ask yourself, how many times do you want to change your hand phone or rather, your other halves?

I don't know about you, but I'm a vintage-collector.

10,000 ++

In just about 4 months?

Thank you for reading :)

OMG school has been reaaally crazy. I mean it has always been but now it's the last lap. As of today, it's 24 more days to finals and I'm just so tired. So so so so so tired. Physically and mentally.

Physically,

Okay here's the thing. Local lectures in UOL are 3 hours long, inclusive of 15 minutes break only. It's mad okay? By the second hour I'm all drained out and my attention span is just, *snap snap* gone.

I thought local lectures were tiring.. Last week, revision classes officially started for me. Revision classes are taught by overseas lecturers flown directly from University of London. These lecturers are the ones who will be marking our papers, so they will go through the do(s) and don't(s).

That's not the best part. Each revision class are 6 freaking hours long inclusive of an hour lunch break and two 10 minutes break. And that is all. It's insane. Some of my classes starts from 8.30am and by 10am I'm just fighting to stay awake or trying my best to absorb the-words-that-are-coming-out-from-my-lecturer's-mouth. Also, I'll be freezing in class even with my winter sweater. Bloody aircon free of charge?

Wait, I'm not done yet. This coming Thursday, I will have classes stretching to exactly 9 hours in school. 3 hour local lectures followed by a 6 hour revision class. Kill me please.

Oh and guess what, next Saturday and Sunday I'll have to go back to school. Yes. Consecutive 6 hour revision classes starting from 8.30am. *waves white flag*

Mentally,

I feel like I'm a little burnt out. I have been studying since the start of the academic year.. I know it's the last lap, I just need to pull through one more month and exams would be over before I know it.

But the local and revision lectures are taking away so much of my time! The moment I reach home, I just wanna crash on my bed. Like knock out big time. But no, I still need to study. I'm running out of time and I'm so tired.

Pardon any typo or grammatical errors okay? I'm gonna catch up on my beauty sleep now. 8.30am revision class tomorrow so yeah that means waking up at 6.30am. I just wanna repay all my sleep debt ASAP. :(

Just incase you miss my face (haha):

Goodnight sweetdreams x

Things I'll Never Say

Things I'll Never Say - Avril Lavigne Lyrics

I’m tugging at my hair

I’m pulling at my clothes

I’m trying to keep my cool

I know it shows

I’m staring at my feet

My cheeks are turning red

I’m searching for the words inside my head

[Pre-Chorus]

(Cause) I’m feeling nervous

Trying to be so perfect

Cause I know you’re worth it

You’re worth it

Yeah

[Chorus]

If I could say what I want to say

I'd say I wanna blow you... away

Be with you every night

Am I squeezing you too tight

If I could say what I want to see

I want to see you go down

On one knee

Marry me today

Guess, I’m wishing my life away

With these things I’ll never say

It don’t do me any good

It’s just a waste of time

What use is it to you

What’s on my mind

If it ain’t coming out

We’re not going anywhere

So why can’t I just tell you that I care

[Pre-Chorus]

[Chorus]

What’s wrong with my tongue

These words keep slipping away

I stutter, I stumble 

Like I’ve got nothing to say

[Pre-Chorus]

Guess I’m wishing my life away with these things I’ll never say

If I could say what I want to say

I'd say I wanna blow you...away

Be with you every night

Am I squeezing you too tight

If I could say what I want to see

I want to see you go down

On one knee

Marry me today

Guess, I’m wishing my life away

With these things I’ll never say

These things I’ll never say

Bullshit.

I swear some people are so fucking stupid I can't even..

It's such a waste of their talent if they do not end up working for a paparazzi-baseless-scandal magazine. I don't even know if that makes sense but one thing is for sure - their forte is to spread shit about people.

You don't even know me. I mean you might have seen me a few times but that's about it. We are not even hi bye friends. We are not even acquaintances. You are just a friend's friend's friend's friend's friend of mine.

How could you talk about me like you know me when I'm sorry but apparently you are so insignificant to the point whereby I didn't even know about your existence until you had to literally try to get my attention?

Well now you have my attention. Thank you for spreading rumors about me that ain't true! It's like WOAH I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW I DID THAT but apparently you do? Ha ha ha.

God only knows how many people have heard about the shit that you just randomly decided to spread. Imagine they actually bought and believed every single word. OMG then I must be a whore to the people who look at me with disgust in their eyes when that's not even true.

It's so fucking amazing what goes through your head, or brain if you actually have one which is most unlikely. It is as if you just woke up one day and out of nowhere you wanted to tell as many people as you can about what you have imagined and making it sound like it's the truth.

Damn, talk about life being unfair. Why do I always have to go through this? I mean, if you wanna spread shit, can you at least make sure there's a link and that it might actually make some sense?

I'm not going to say what happened but if you hear shit about me, kindly please come up to me and at least give me a chance to clarify?

Thank god K came to ask me if it's true. I can only imagine how long the rumor has been spreading and how many stupid people might see me the way you successfully led them to.

I'm so bloody sick of dealing with these baseless gossips and rumors that I end up just laughing so loud and go WHAAAT?

For example:

Wow, I didn't know I actually had such a fun weekend when I clearly remembered that I was studying with friends at the library during O's (yes I kid you not, even during secondary school days also got retarded people wanna anyhow defame me). Hello? I have alibis?

Or like apparently I was out dating some guy when at that very moment I was with my mother. Um? Yeah sure I can totally be at two places or you're implying that my mummy is a guy. Orh hor.. I tell my mother.

The most epic one was when S texted me to ask me to keep my volume down in the lecture hall. But... I was actually at home resting that day because I was down with a fever. Freaky much?

Bitch please. Y u so stupid?

MICHELLE'S & APRIL'S 21ST BIRTHDAY PARTY (AS SOLD SEPARATELY)

LOLOLOL AT MY TITLE ^

Michelle's Advanced 21st Birthday Surprise Party @ Meralodge, Bukit Timah, 22nd March, Saturday

Actual Birthdate: 1st April, Tuesday (April Fools, that explains everything hahaha)

Pasmine was really sweet to plan a surprise birthday party for Michelle! Awww, bestfriends for the win really. And the rest of us were the preparation team!

I blew so many balloons omg my mouth tasted like pure rubber powder.

That April went to video me when I was such a balloon-blowing-loser, we laughed like mad I swear, like mad. I made this crazy farting sound from my mouth because of the friction between braces and rubber. LOLOL

Wilson Song! :) We go a long long long way back. Officer Song got talent with anything artistic and in this case, balloons. HAHAHA, HE WAS OUR SAVIOUR.

Throw back to 5 years ago, Officer Song did this for me:

He is so talented right heh heh!

Pasmine! :) "Eh don't film me I very aunty now" HAHA still pretty okay?

Her majestic art piece:

April and yours truly

Me, April and Heidy <3

So much for helping out, we were taking photos as if it's my birthday again. Lolol, at least I blew some balloons, not like April and Heidy please. Sit there look pretty only. HAHAHA

Yan Jiang! :) My partner in crime that day! Thank god never wait for him to mount on braces please, from secondary school until now he still haven't fixed appointment yet and I'm like left with 3 more months to dismounting?

Michelle, your full prop team :)

More balloons done by Officer Song!

I swear Wilson has a flair for blowing balloons. His one breath can blow 3 segments out!!! Not easy at all I swear. Yan Jiang and I were super pathetic, one cannot tie the balloon, one cannot blow the segments. HAHA.

I look hot from the back right? Haha *shy* just kidding uh, aunty Yong..

See! I helped out okay! Hahaha so glam I cannot even.

Tadah, Wilson's masterpiece. Looks abit like Malay wedding the decor right. HAHA AIYAH WILSON IS HALF MALAY ANYWAY LOL.

April <3 (Don't complain you never appear on my blog k. Haha next whole post is all about your birthday. TSK)

Heidy <3 (Currently I meet her so freaking often it's like more than anyone else, what has UOL done to us?!)

AND THE FOOD CAME. MAMAMIA. Oh for those of you who don't know, I ONLY eat Hawaiian.

While waiting for the birthday girl to come (Pasmine left to pick her), we decided to camwhore a little! :)

The Birthday Girl's Arrival (Was Fucking Epic)

Pardon her hair, my dear Michelle is enlisting as a police woman on Monday so yes, Madam!

Her entrance was so fucking epic:

Oblivious Michelle: "Eh fuck you all lah, what you all doing here, you all just go and die lah, wahlao force me wear dress, cab what cab, my shoe bag still here, weather so hot, *points to the guys* you all say you all eating go and die lah, *points to the girls* you say you all studying go and die lah, what you all doing here, CHEEBYE."

Me: "Surprise? Hahaha Happy Birthday bitch." *hugs*

Michelle: "Huh, what birthday?"

Us: "Your birthday lah wtf. If not?"

Michelle: "Ohhhhhhhhhh."

HAHAHA THAT BIMBO. FINALLY SHE SMILED AND WAS HAPPY ABOUT THE WHOLE THING.

Nom nom nom

I looked at Yan Jiang, it's time to take the cake! :)

Background story about the birthday cake.. Our birthday girl is such a pain in the ass, she doesn't eat cakes. So dear Pasmine had to tell Clarice to buy Haagen Dazs ice cream cake from freaking Hougang to Bukit Timah. And be use the dry ice was "melting" and we didn't have freezer, Wilson, Yang Jiang and I had to find a freezer to store the cake.

Guess what? We ended up knocking on the doors of residences living in that condo. Confirm because I pretty, we has 2 different units opening their doors. Coincidentally or not, both are males. So confirm it's because I'm pretty please. Hahaha

First unit-

Me: "Hi, sorry to bother you but we're at the function room just down the hall. We have an ice cream cake and we need a freezer badly, could we borrow your freezer space please?"

Male Owner: "When do you need it because I'm leaving for lunch."

Damn..

Second unit after knocking on many units-

Me: (repeats same story)

Super uper duper nice Male Owner: "Sure sure but I do not have space in the freezer, will the normal refrigeration do?"

Us: "OMG yes please thank you thank you, we'll be back in about 2 hours."

Wilson went in to put the cake and when he came out, he said the owner removed everything from his freezer like mooncakes and all just to squeeze in our cake. NICE OR WHAT? Faith in humanity restored there and then.

Collection of our cake was madness I swear. Yan Jiang and I went back to the unit but nobody answered. We knocked, banged the door but I think he fell asleep. We went downstairs to take a look at his balcony but he wasn't there either. Then we went back up and rang the door bell like cray cray and after a good 15 mins, he opened the door. I swear the owner was damn sweet because he apologised. Are you kidding me? We were the ones who should be apologizing for being so troublesome and infringing on his privacy.

The ice cream cake was slanted but ohwell at least it wasn't completely melted because it could have totally been that way.

We lighted the candles and the stupid birthday girl had to spoil her own surprise. Hahaha nonetheless we sang her the birthday song and pictures time!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY MICHELLE! <3

Oh her parents came too! Haha surprise surprise! They left home like 5mins after she did, hahaha.

Smile! :)

YAY. Time to eat the ice cream cake!

I have never eaten a birthday cake with so much 'feel' before hahaha everybody was like scooping ice cream and eating directly from it! Omg it was freaking orgasm in our mouths.

And then we played games haha so kiddish I like. Technically it is an advanced celebration so she can still afford to be young and have some fun.

Musical Chairs and Charades

Everybody kept saying I violent, so I kept my hands to myself *sobs sobs*

I lasted until top 3 and I didn't win cause I gave the birthday girl a chance to squeeze with her scandal, hahaha I literally ran away when the music stopped LOLOL.

Too many. Too. Many. Unglam. Shots.

Photo-taking Time

Birthday girl <3

She say take photo with me will look fat, so I solved her problem! :) Then everyone was like OMG yah it works, heh heh duh Sarah to the rescue!

My favourite clique! <3

I thought she cried, thought.

Groupshots:

First one super fail haha

 

Ah lian self timer for the win hahaha, thank you Pasmine! <3

I love you, Madam Lim. <3

What April, Heidy and I bought for Michelle. I think I've got pretty good taste, just saying.. :) It turned out that stupid woman loved the Bvlgari box (meant as a facade only) out of all the presents we bought her. Next year birthday buy her boxes only k. LOL

Dear, don't forget we still owe you a birthday meal. Hope you're doing well in camp, jiayou police woman! <3

April's Advanced 21st Birthday Party @ Orchid Country Club, 29th March, Saturday

Actual Birthdate: 2nd April, Wednesday

Theme: Monochrome

My face for the day hahaha so not 21 please, stop saying I look old all you mean people. TSK

Love the decor!

OMG the variety of foood *thumbs up*

Birthday girl, April Tam <3

Me, Michelle, April, Xue Li and Heidy <3

I was her "professional" Polaroid camera woman, but see when a non profession take when it's my turn.. EEYER, HEIDY LAH. HAHAHA

Please uh, don't even look like her. She used to be so cute (what happened LOL), confirm adopted one hahaha. Kidding kidding love love.

Her guestbook so nice! But ahem of course mine nicer thanks. LOLOLOL.

Oh HAHAHAHA featuring my hand model Heidy Yeo ah Yeo the youngest of my clique. Wth when she just turned 20 not too long ago we all turned 21 already. Confirm confirm she's a gift from valentines because if you do the math, well she's November baby uh!

We were playing Black Jack while waiting for the other guests to come, haha what the shit 10 cents also can play until so fun I swear we really damn lame.

Birthday cake (was damn sweet by the way)

My dear girl turning 21 soon, so fast all grown up already :'(

(Bimbos) were the last clique to take photo haha don't judge k.

A total of 21 guests excluding birthday girl, of which so many were secondary school friends!

While waiting for the birthday girl to distribute the cake, 'but first, let us take a selfie' LOLOL.

I'm sorry but can I just bring your attention to Michelle's cute face on the 5th picture. HAHAHA

Our compulsory ah lian shots.

My police woman book out lo! Haha but she damn irritating whole night ask people to sign on, enlist. LOL. Love her to the max uh. <3

<3 <3 <3 <3

<3 <3

See! I put my unglam face too okay, but please lah pretty girl is forever pretty uh. HAHA. *thick skin* *flips hair*

My favourite people in the whole wide world :)

Hong Yuan looks like Matt (one of my friends from poly) just saying..

Navy blue for braces this month! Bed shots make you look fat, hahaha so yeah it's not our fault k.

The present Heidy, Michelle and I bought for April. Okay lah she wanted it but the rest keep saying it's ugly. Haha they damn idiot. I think it's not bad, but not for me.

Overall, I'm really starting to love birthday parties. You get to catch up with familiar faces (even if you have never talked to them in school before, or you were once close but people drift apart and all) just because they are there as friends of the birthday boy/girl! It's like a mini reunion if you get what I mean. :)

Also, I love how even if I'm the joke at times, okay fine most of the time, I get to see my friends laugh. Especially at parties if the atmosphere is dying or what, I totally pride myself for being the life/ source of light (LOL). I'm glad I brought joy to many in my life, love you all. X